Your Self Esteem: You Are The Only Who Can Build or Destroy It

We can easily gauge the level of our self esteem be evaluating how much we approve of ourselves. A person with high self esteem is happy and satisfied with himself. What other people think about them doesn’t bother them much. They know what they are and are happy about it. It is from within that they know about themselves.

If someone told you that you have black teeth would it affect your self esteem? Obviously not. You would probably just ignore my opinion or reaffirm that your teeth are not black. Hence what anyone says to you should not influence you much. Your self esteem should not change because others say things to you.

But if someone pointed out an area where you already lag confidence, you are bound to become all the more nervous. You won’t be able to ignore my opinion.

If I told you that you are not a good parent or a friend would it affect your self esteem? It would if you already doubt your parenting or your attitude towards your friends. If someone comments on an area where you think you have lot to improve you may feel low and your confidence gets impacted.

Self esteem gets the most influenced by the things we tell to ourselves. It is said that on an average we think about 5000 thoughts in an hour. Brian Tracy quotes that around 77% of the time we talk negative to ourselves. Obviously, if you talk negative for such a long period of time, you will never be high on self esteem.

Self esteem hence is dependent primarily on how you think about yourself. So you are the only one who can change it to a higher level. The simplest technique to do is to think and talk positive to yourself.
Many people feel that what others say to them makes them feel good or bad. But this is not true. Unless you allow their influence to percolate to your psyche, you cannot feel anything. Hence you have a complete control on whether to accept and react to what people say. Eleanor Roosevelt has rightly said, “ No one can make you feel inferior without you allowing it.”

No one will force to accept what he or she says. Also the way we react is to be decided by us only. You have to make a wise decision whether to accept or reject someone else’s opinion, because it is this decision that will affect your self esteem.

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